On violence, racism and grief

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View this email online Sarah Gonzales/NPR Friends, Last Saturday, a gunman in Buffalo, New York walked into a supermarket and shot 13 people in what authorities are calling a racially motivated attack. Ten people died. It’s the deadliest mass shooting this year. It was also the 198th mass shooting in the U.S. in 2022. The Gun Violence Archive counts at least eight more mass shootings – in which at least four people were shot – in the days that have followed.  206 mass shootings in 2022 alone (and counting). What a tally. Sadly, there will be more. There are hundreds of mass shootings each year – and that’s not even the majority of gun violence. There are also thousands of hate crimes a year: in the latest data from the Justice Department, there were 8,052 hate crimes in 2020, most of which were racially motivated.  When we’re looking at such grave tragedies in such large numbers, it can be easy to feel numb to it all. Sometimes things are too hard and scary to be fully comprehended, and a weekend of hate-related shootings added to the decades of watching Black people die definitely qualifies.    But in yet another moment of great national tragedy fueled by violence and mainstream race-based hate, it’s important to remember what an incredible luxury numbness can be. In Buffalo, people are left planning vigils for their lost loved ones and filling the gaps of the food desert left by the shooting and calling for honest conversations about segregation and redlining. In Buffalo and beyond, Black mothers are sitting their kids down to have “the talk” about the dangers of being Black in America…again.  The rest of us are called to “lean into the pain,” as Buffalo’s poet laureate Jillian Hanesworth advised her community to do. We can bear witness, and hold space for the grief and pain of others, and educate ourselves, and speak out against mistreatment and just do what we can.    Newsletter continues after sponsor message Kristen Uroda/NPR Our small contribution today is a list of our resources on dealing with racism, grief and violence.  Process compounding racial trauma: This episode observing the anniversary of George Floyd’s murder reminds us that racial trauma builds in small and big ways, and carries through generations Deal with disenfranchised grief: Bereavement expert Kenneth Doka defines this as grief that you don’t feel entitled to, or that isn’t publicly acknowledged. Here’s how and why to work through it. Reflect on your anti-racism: Author Ibram X. Kendi’s book Be Antiracist provides journaling prompts for reflection, awareness and action. Talk about racism with your people: What you’re not changing, you are choosing. These guides offer practical tips on standing up to microaggressions, talking racism with your parents and how white parents can talk to kids about race. Learn bystander intervention: You have options if you witness someone being attacked or harassed. Listen to this episode or read our comic on the five D’s of bystander intervention.   We’ve learned too often that hate and violence can catch on quickly. But by doing our own work, and showing up for each other, we can do more to promote love and unity and compassion. We’re all in this together, friends. –Andee Tagle, Life Kit producer   📢 ANNOUNCING LIFE KIT+ 📢 Get all the get-it-together tips and tricks you need – and support the show you love – by subscribing to Life Kit+. You'll also get to listen to the show sponsor and interruption free! Learn more at plus.npr.org/lifekit.  Stream your local NPR station. Visit NPR.org to find your local station stream. What do you think of today's email? We'd love to hear your thoughts, questions and feedback: LifeKit@npr.org Enjoying this newsletter? Forward to a friend! They can sign up here. Looking for more great content? Check out all of our newsletter offerings — including Daily News, Code Switch, Health and more! You received this message because you're subscribed to Life Kit emails. This email was sent by National Public Radio, Inc., 1111 North Capitol Street NE, Washington, DC 20002 Unsubscribe  |  Privacy Policy