How to protect your ears👂

Plus: Why 'bathing' in a forest is good for your health 🌲🌲🌲

View this email online Kaz Fantone/NPR In seventh grade, I used to carpool to school with three girls who lived in my neighborhood. We spent the early morning drive with our headphones in, blasting our preferred playlists. And our parents would always warn us: all that loud music could damage our hearing.  At the time, I was unconcerned. But now I wonder whether listening to Sum 41 at maximum volume affected my ears.  In today’s newsletter, we share a comic about how to protect your hearing. Narrated by an adorable cartoon ear, we learn about the role of hair cells in the ear, hearing issues that may be a concern and how to take care of your ears. Hint: Go easy on the Q-tips! Read the comic here —Clare Marie Schneider, Life Kit producer Newsletter continues after sponsor message Access Sponsor-Free Episodes Want to support our show? Try a subscription to Life Kit+ and get all the tips and tricks you love sponsor-free! Learn more at plus.npr.org/lifekit.  Learn More In the news Maria Grejc for NPR Student loan repayment is resuming. Here's what you need to know. The three-year federal pause on student loans is expiring soon. If your financial circumstances have changed, or you just need an explanation of the many payment plans out there, here's a refresher course on how to pay off your student debt. Listen to the episode. Plus, NPR’s education desk has more great tips here.   Gary Hershorn/Getty Images Stomp, scrape, repeat: What you can do to stop the spotted lanternfly. It’s egg-laying season for the spotted lanternfly, a beautiful but invasive bug that’s been a concern in the U.S. since 2014. The situation is bad enough that the U.S. Department of Agriculture has been telling people to kill them on-site. Other than stomping on them to help keep the population in check, what else should you know about this bug? Listen to the episode.   schfer/Getty Images Get your household ready for the next hurricane. The window of time people have to get ready for a natural disaster is shortening. Hurricane Idalia, for example, intensified into a major hurricane very rapidly. Here’s how to create an evacuation plan and what you need to pack in your go-bag. Read the article. Self improvement Kaz Fantone/NPR When is it OK to lie? Experts weigh in on when it's appropriate to tell a lie, explain how lying can lead to more lying and share tips for cutting back if you want to break the habit. Read the article.       d3sign/Getty Images Spending time with trees can be good for your health. Researchers say that forest bathing, or taking in the forest through your senses, can boost your immune system, reduce blood pressure, lower stress hormones and improve your physical and emotional state. Here’s how to reap the benefits on your next walk through the woods. Listen to the episode. Dear Life Kit Photographs by Alexander Grey/Unsplash; Sergio Rodriguez/Unsplash; collage by Kaz Fantone/NPR My husband shuts down any time I try to talk about our finances. A Life Kit listener shares a dilemma: “I'm struggling to get my husband to make a family budget with me. Whenever the topic comes up, he completely shuts down or gets defensive.” Financial therapist Lindsay Bryan-Podvin weighs in. Read the article. Stream your local NPR station. Visit NPR.org to find your local station stream. What do you think of today's email? We'd love to hear your thoughts, questions and feedback: LifeKit@npr.org Enjoying this newsletter? Forward to a friend! They can sign up here. Looking for more great content? Check out all of our newsletter offerings — including Daily News, Code Switch, Health and more! You received this message because you're subscribed to Life Kit emails. This email was sent by National Public Radio, Inc., 1111 North Capitol Street NE, Washington, DC 20002 Unsubscribe  |  Privacy Policy

Plus: Speed, a murder comedy, and a gaggle of late-night hosts

View this email online by Linda Holmes Welcome! It was the week when Taylor Swift created a new wrinkle. It was the week when Adam Driver talked solidarity. And it was the week when a big book prize named its finalists. Let's get to it. How an interactive romantic comedy makes the case against AI writing During the ongoing WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes, one topic of interest has been AI, or artificial intelligence -- really, more accurately, machine learning. Nobody seriously believes that AI is currently in a position to write its own movies with any success, but there have been scenarios floated in which perhaps consumers could use AI-generated scripts and digitally stored copies of actors to essentially choose their own film: "I want a romance starring Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone where she's a bank robber and he's a cop" or something like that. Honestly? Sounds terrible! Into this landscape comes the movie Choose Love, Netflix's most recent experiment in making "interactive" films. The highest-profile effort up to now was probably the Black Mirror episode "Bandersnatch" in 2018. While it was interesting to see the technology at work (you make a series of choices using your remote, which drives the story forward), it didn't really work narratively. And it doesn't work narratively here, either. Cami (Laura Marano), left, Jack (Jordi Webber), Rex (Avan Jogia) and Paul (Scott Michael Foster) / Netflix Directed by Stuart McDonald and written by Josann McGibbon, Choose Love is about a woman named Cami (Laura Marano) who works as a recording engineer. She has a boyfriend, Paul, played by Scott Michael Foster. But when she gets a tarot reading because she feels something is missing from her life, she learns that she has three possible suitors. One is Paul. The other two, who quickly turn up, turn out to be her old boyfriend, Jack (Jordi Webber), and a rock star she meets at work, Rex (Avan Jogia). So in one scene (a scene that is not at the end of the movie!), Cami has to decide between Paul, Jack and Rex. And then she ends up with one of them. That's the story. Now, you might ask yourself why a woman with a lovely boyfriend would suddenly leave him for either an old boyfriend she's been apart from for years or a rock star she met at work with whom she's spent a few hours. I asked myself that too! That's why Paul was my choice, so I picked Paul, so Cami picked Paul, and she ended up with Paul, and ... there you go. I did not watch every minute of the other two ways for the story to go (it doesn't really lend itself to any particular linear or completist viewing in any handy way), but I explored the other possible storylines enough to learn that there's no particular cleverness -- it's not as if you pick one but end up with another one, or no matter who you pick, you end up with the same guy, or something like that. You pick the ending you want, and it gives it to you. I didn't count, but I would say I probably made ... a total of 15 or so choices over the course of the movie? Something like that? Some of them matter a little, some matter almost not at all. It's profoundly unsatisfying, and I think it conceptually fails to understand how much of fiction is about letting a creative person make creative choices and experiencing them as a viewer/reader. But I also think it fails to understand that interactive storytelling already has some very successful models, and they don't look like this. They look like the wonderful and haunting video game Kentucky Route Zero, a seemingly simple point-and-click game over the course of which you make many, many choices about where to go next, what to say, what to do. What you do not do is get an endings list from which you get to choose. There is one ending. You will get there. The same is true of the beloved game The Last of Us, which not only has a single ending, but has a single controversial ending. That's not to say there aren't beloved games with multiple endings; there absolutely are. But successful interactive storytelling has models to learn from, and they generally involve iterative choices that take you down branching paths, not "which guy do you want to end up with" questions that just kind of ... serve you whatever outcome you ordered. That's why this might have worked if your choices had not gone as you anticipated -- picking Paul in that moment led you to end up single, something like that. But this? Picking an end point and watching yourself get there because ... you asked to get there? If people want to do that, they can just buy a set of finger puppets and play the thing out at home. If you want people to write their own endings, you're getting into the realm of fanfiction, and fanfiction requires people to have a lot more creative options, a lot more ways to go. In other words, you can write the ending of your story or I can, but for you to write a menu and me to order from it feels like an uncanny valley of creation that satisfies nobody. I mean, I didn't think Ross and Rachel should have ended up together on Friends, but do I want to watch an AI-generated ending where she doesn't get on the plane? No! What would be the point? This is why I cannot get excited about the idea of a bespoke, AI-generated movie that I order up like a pizza. The enjoyment of fiction lives in the meeting of your mind as a reader or viewer with the specifics of other people's brilliant, weird, flawed, unexpected minds. Even in a genre with rules like murder mystery (the crime will be solved) or romance (there will be a happy ending), there is always discovery. Without discovery -- without the possibility of frustration, in fact -- there are no stakes in the act of reading or watching. There are a lot of ways that machine learning could harm actors and writers; that's why it's an issue in the strikes. But any idea that boundless customization is the way of the future seems to me to misunderstand the relationship between creator and audience and the negotiation that goes on between the two. When I watch your movie, I want to like it. You hope I like it. I know I might not. You know I might not. But you have your role to play, and I have mine, and we both hope for the best. It's terrifying, but the joy of fiction lives in that uncertainty, and it's not a problem for technology to solve. Newsletter continues after sponsor message We Recommend I've started listening to 50 MPH, which is -- yes -- a planned 50-episode podcast about Speed from film journalist Kris Tapley. Does this sound wildly unnecessary? Yes. Am I extremely excited to hear the many voices promised across the series? Yes. Do I think you should get super-pumped about it and throw yourself into a long story of craft and culture? I do. Very high on the current Netflix charts is the thriller series Who Is Erin Carter?, which is about a woman whose mysterious past unfurls after she and her daughter are caught in a robbery. Do I think it's great? I do not. But do I think it's highly watchable for people who read that description and think "that sounds like it's up my alley"? Sure. Strike Force Five, the new podcast from late-night hosts Jimmy Kimmel, Seth Meyers, Jimmy Fallon, Stephen Colbert and John Oliver, is a little rough around the edges (a couple of those guys need better mic setups, I'm just saying). But it's fun, and they seem to all like each other, and they do tell some pretty good stories in the opening episode. The series Deadloch is a comedy that's a sendup of grim small-town murder mysteries like Broadchurch, but it also kind of is a grim small-town murder mystery, while also being extremely funny, and I don't know exactly how they pull it off. It's an Australian show set in Tasmania, and you can stream it on Amazon. It's exceedingly hard to describe in a way that does it justice, but give it a shot. Listen to the Podcast Sponsor-Free Support your favorite pop culture junkies AND listen without sponsor interruptions with a subscription to Pop Culture Happy Hour+! Learn more and sign up at plus.npr.org/happy. Learn More What We Did This Week Natalie Dew and H. Jon Benjamin voice the characters Zara Kahn and Sterling Archer on FX's Archer. / FX We revisited Stephen and Glen's discussion with Kathy Tu about Archer. Gene Demby and I talked about two great HBO scammer documentaries: Telemarketers and BS High. Stephen talked to Sheldon Pearce about the K-pop sensation NewJeans. And I was joined by Kristen Meinzer and Ronald Young, Jr. to talk about the streaming sensation of the summer (for whatever reason): Suits. Stephen was quite busy this week over at NPR Music. If you're not reading the NPR Music newsletter (which he's now usually writing), you might not have seen his review of a new box set from Bon Iver and Megafaun members. And did you see the Speedy Ortiz Tiny Desk, which he wrote up? Maybe you heard him this week on New Music Friday! Suffice it to say, a musical week. What's Making Us Happy Every week on the show, we talk about some other things out in the world that have been giving us joy lately. Here they are: Ronald Young, Jr.: Telemarketers Kristen Meinzer: Celebrity Book Club with Chelsea Devantez Linda Holmes: Once More with Feeling by Elissa Sussman Stream your local NPR station. Visit NPR.org to find your local station stream. Subscribe to Pop Culture Happy Hour+. Your support helps make our show possible and unlocks access to our sponsor-free episodes. What do you think of today's email? We'd love to hear your thoughts, questions and feedback: pchh@npr.org Enjoying this newsletter? Forward to a friend! They can sign up here. Looking for more great content? Check out all of our newsletter offerings — including Music, Books, Daily News and more! You received this message because you're subscribed to Pop Culture Happy Hour emails. This email was sent by National Public Radio, Inc., 1111 North Capitol Street NE, Washington, DC 20002 Unsubscribe  |  Privacy Policy

How to become a kid’s favorite adult

Plus, how do you help your parents handle $$$?

View this email online Kaz Fantone/NPR My niece is only 15 months old but I am already trying to secure the title of “favorite auntie.” Even though I live almost 3,000 miles away from her, I want her to feel loved and supported by me. There is seemingly endless advice for parents about how to raise children. But what about the aunties, uncles, friends and neighbors out there?  Our Life Kit episode, “5 Tips to become a kid’s favorite adult” has some great ideas on how to foster healthy relationships with children. We talk to Erlanger Turner, a child and adolescent psychologist, and Rachel Cargle, an author who highlights the joys of auntie life, about how to show up for the kids in our lives.  5 Helpful strategies to support kids First off, it’s important to ask yourself how often you want to stay in touch, says Turner. Kids develop attachments and get used to a particular level of interaction. For me, that means being the auntie who will visit on birthdays, bearing heartfelt gifts.  Even though my niece won’t remember her first trip around the sun, I flew cross country to celebrate her with the rest of my family. As a gift, I framed a poem I wrote for her the week she was born. She can’t read yet, but I like the idea of her having a record of her first days.  Listen to the episode here Here are three more things you can do to become the “favorite auntie.”  🎶 Figure out your shared interests. Think about an activity or subject you enjoy that you can share with the kids in your life. "A lot of the auntie role is, of course, caretaking," says Cargle. "But it's also teaching and exposing and introducing and showing up."  Do you like getting your nails done or making TikToks? Is the kid in your life a big Seahawks fan or are they really good at math? See which hobbies intrigue the child and help their interest grow.  💭 Be a safe space where kids can express themselves. The main difference between a parent-child relationship and say, an auntie-child relationship, is that you're not the primary caretaker, says Turner. Unlike being a parent, there's less pressure to be the perfect role model. And kids might be afraid to share certain things with their parents because they're worried they'll get in trouble or disappoint them. Because aunties and uncles operate in this neutral safe zone, says Turner, they can listen to kids a little bit differently than their parents.  For this reason, kids “may be more comfortable sharing certain things" with you. So offer a listening ear without trying to fix or change the situation.  💪 Be an ally to the parents. If a kid sees you as a safe person, they might start sharing their secrets with you. Sometimes these are fun secrets, like a surprise they're planning for Mother's Day. But a time may come when they tell you or ask you about something that is outside the scope of your relationship, like questions about sex and love. Turner says if a child shares something with you that you don't feel comfortable keeping secret, follow this two-step process. Before you talk to the parents, validate the child and what they've shared with you. Then, explain how you feel and talk about how you want to proceed. Turner says you might say, ”Hey, I know you told me this and you wanted me to keep this a secret, but I think that it is something that I need to share with your parents."  Kids might be upset at first, but Turner says they usually get it. "In most cases, the kids understand that you're an adult and that adults have to make some tough decisions that maybe they don't agree with." It will be years until my niece can talk to me about whatever she’s thinking about or going through. In the meantime, I’ll cherish going on walks with her and listening to her animal sounds.  —Clare Marie Schneider, Life Kit producer and editor    Newsletter continues after sponsor message Access Sponsor-Free Episodes Want to support our show? Try a subscription to Life Kit+ and get all the tips and tricks you love sponsor-free! Learn more at plus.npr.org/lifekit.  Learn More More advice on how to hone adult-kid relationships      Malte Mueller/Getty Images ⏰ This 5-minute daily playtime ritual can get your kids to listen better. Called "special time," the strategy is widely recommended by children's health professionals to help reduce behavioral issues in young children. Here's a guide on how to do it with your kids at home.   Malte Mueller/Getty Images 💞 Want to create a stronger bond with your kids? First relinquish control. It may sound counterintuitive, but if you want to take charge as a parent, stop trying to control your child, says psychologist and author Shefali Tsabary. Her new book, "The Parenting Map," lays out a step-by-step guide for creating conscious parent-child relationships.   Malte Mueller/Getty Images 👿 Are we raising unhelpful, bossy kids? Here's the fix. In some cultures, kids roll their eyes when asked to do chores. In others, they'll pitch in without even being asked. Researchers have identified two key practices for raising helpful children.   We want to hear from you Do you help your parents with their finances? Ask the experts. If you help manage your parents’ finances, we want to hear from you. Tell us about your situation. What would you like a financial or caregiving expert to weigh in on? For example, how do I split these responsibilities with my siblings? What do I need to know on the legal side? Send us a voice memo via email with your story and questions by Tuesday, September 5. Include your full name and where you live. Your question — and a response from our experts — may be featured in an upcoming episode or story on NPR.org. Stream your local NPR station. Visit NPR.org to find your local station stream. What do you think of today's email? We'd love to hear your thoughts, questions and feedback: LifeKit@npr.org Enjoying this newsletter? Forward to a friend! They can sign up here. Looking for more great content? Check out all of our newsletter offerings — including Daily News, Code Switch, Health and more! You received this message because you're subscribed to Life Kit emails. This email was sent by National Public Radio, Inc., 1111 North Capitol Street NE, Washington, DC 20002 Unsubscribe  |  Privacy Policy