🧠 Your best advice on relationships and friendships

Here's one: Leave the party while it's still fun.

View this email online Photographs Unsplash; Collage by Becky Harlan and Trish Pickelhaupt/NPR Hi y’all, Have you ever gotten a piece of advice that really resonated with you? Maybe it came from a trusted friend, or it hit you at exactly the right time. Great advice has the power to change us.  When I was in my early 20s, an older (and wiser) cousin said something to me that I still think about. “Of your job, your relationship and your housing situation — only have one in flux at a time. Otherwise you’ll get overwhelmed,” she said.  I got this guidance because I was living in a windowless bedroom in Washington, D.C., disheartened by my job and questioning my multi-year relationship. Her advice was *ahem* well-timed and helped me realize that I needed to get at least one of those areas under control, ASAP.  Newsletter continues after sponsor message Back in February, we shared life advice from Dear Life Kit experts, and also asked for the best advice you had ever received. Y’all delivered. We got over 500 pearls of wisdom, and this week we’re sharing some of the best tips for keeping your relationships happy and healthy. These submissions have been edited for length and clarity.  👋 Ask for help. I’ve learned that it keeps me from trying to be an army of one. And people like to help one another, it makes them feel appreciated and seen for their gifts and talents. — Sara Smith  💐 My college pastor once told me, "don't send flowers when someone dies, send flowers when they are alive." That advice has always stuck with me. It reminds me to show my gratitude in the here and now. — Bethany Anderson  💌 You need to be a good friend to have a good friend. — Julie Rose 🙋‍♀️ Leave the party while it's still fun. Too many of us feel the need to stay too long in relationships that we know deep down were never meant to go the distance, in jobs we love but are meant to be stepping stones to greater challenges and growth that lies ahead, in the splendor of childhood innocence that's better kept as a sweet memory. — Jan Ketcham 🌩 My mom used to tell me, “The more people who become involved in a disagreement, the less likely it is to be resolved.” I have seen the truth of this play out in many situations over the years. — Jenny Hougendobler 🗣 How someone treats you tells you more about who they are than about who you are. How you respond tells them more about who you are than about who they are. — Nona Kahn ☕ Right before we got on a plane and moved to the Philippines (from Macon, Georgia) my favorite Auntie told me, "You're not going to be everyone's cup of tea, and that's OK. Your weirdos will find you." I was 8 years old and I have never forgotten it. It hasn't always been easy, but in the end I have always found my weirdos. — Beth McGraw   “You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea,” is advice I’m still trying to internalize. Working on it. Stay tuned, because we’re going to be sharing more of your favorite advice over the next few months. In the meantime, have a great weekend. —Julia Carney, Podcast Coordinator   ⬇ Keep scrolling for more tips from Life Kit  Access Sponsor-Free Episodes Want to support our show? Try a subscription to Life Kit+ and get all the tips and tricks you love sponsor-free! Learn more at plus.npr.org/lifekit.  Learn More More on community and connection from Life Kit: 👀 How to give better advice — lessons from an advice columnist. 😳 Want to make friends? Embrace the awkwardness. 😘 What makes a good partner — and how to cultivate connection. 🌱 How to cope with the end of a friendship. 💖 What’s your attachment style? Take this quiz. How to ace a job interview with Life Kit host Marielle Segarra and Cynthia Pong, the founder & CEO of Embrace Change— a career coaching and consulting firm that works with women of color.  Life Kit is on YouTube! Check out the playlist on the NPR Podcasts channel. Stream your local NPR station. Visit NPR.org to find your local station stream. What do you think of today's email? We'd love to hear your thoughts, questions and feedback: LifeKit@npr.org Enjoying this newsletter? Forward to a friend! They can sign up here. Looking for more great content? Check out all of our newsletter offerings — including Daily News, Code Switch, Health and more! You received this message because you're subscribed to Life Kit emails. This email was sent by National Public Radio, Inc., 1111 North Capitol Street NE, Washington, DC 20002 Unsubscribe  |  Privacy Policy

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View this email online As you may have seen, NPR's organizational accounts will no longer be active on Twitter. The platform is taking actions that undermine our credibility by falsely implying that we are not editorially independent. After great consideration, we will not put our journalism on platforms that have demonstrated an interest in undermining our credibility and the public’s understanding of editorial independence.   Millions of Americans depend on NPR and local NPR Member stations for the factual, independent journalism they need to stay informed. I want to reassure you that while we are turning away from Twitter, we will never turn away from you. A vital part of what makes it possible for us to uphold the non-negotiable values of independent journalism are donations from people like you. If you'd like to show your support, please donate. Support Independent Journalism There are still plenty of ways to stay connected and keep up with NPR's freely available news, music, and cultural content. You can subscribe to additional newsletters covering a variety of topics. Download the NPR app to read, listen and connect to your local Member station.  You can find us on other social media platforms, including Facebook and Instagram. Now, more than ever, public access to factual, non-biased journalism is crucial. As always, thank you for your support. John Lansing NPR President and CEO Donate Now You received this message because you're subscribed to Life Kit emails. This email was sent by National Public Radio, Inc., 1111 North Capitol Street NE, Washington, DC 20002 Unsubscribe  |  Privacy Policy

Plus: Super Mario, Boston celebrities, and 'Succession'

View this email online by Linda Holmes Welcome!  It was the week when Mario seemed Super, indeed. It was the week when people went wild for Barbie. And it was the week when we learned that they are not waiting very long to make the live-action remake of Moana. Let's get to it. This notebook will change everything From time to time on social media, you'll see reflections on a now-familiar idea: a blank notebook as a sign of a magical fresh start. Sometimes, this is treated as particular to writers, but not always. Perhaps the notebook is not for large writing projects, but just for journaling, or planning the week. Maybe it's not a notebook at all, but a new rainbow of pens, laid out in a row, next to a blank book with a colored cover -- I favor the Leuchtturm1917, myself, in the dotted format.  Let's be honest: In a lot of ways, electronic calendars are much easier, more efficient and clean. You can click on an appointment and move it around, delete it, copy it. Recurring meetings multiply neatly, and if you like, you can tell your calendar that they continue forever into the future, as if in 2052, you'll still be going to that 12:30 standup on Wednesdays. Filling up a notebook with blue lists, purple appointments, red to-do items, and tiny x-marks populating a habit tracker takes longer. You might even need, I kid you not, white out -- AKA liquid paper -- which we used to use in the olden days to cover mistakes made in pen. They make it in the form of tape now, so you don't have to paint it on like nail polish and blow on it. Getty Images There is always something self-deprecating about these "this notebook will solve all my problems" confessions. Of course the notebook will not solve anything on its own, we know this. But can I tell you something? I really, really love a new notebook. I love drawing lines with a ruler. I have a set of stencils for journaling that I can use to draw rows, as well as columns of small boxes, circles, and hexagons I can color in one at a time as I finish tasks, like a modestly more sophisticated version of the gold stars stickers I always hoped for from my teachers. When I was in law school, my brain was a jumble, but the notes I made to study for exams were beautiful. I put cases in one color, rules of law in another color -- it got to the point where at the end of each semester, classmates would watch me go to work and say, "Ohhh, here come the pens." I wish I still had those outlines. Not for the information they contained, but for the way they memorialized the most organized moment of my academic life.  For the good of the trees, it is admittedly not ideal to accumulate paper notebooks you don't use up. So I wish I could tell you it scratches the same itch to turn to a new page in a blank book I already have rather than getting a new one, because it would mean less paper, not to mention less clutter. But I think the fact that I itch for it to be a whole new volume connects on a cellular level with the very idea of a new book, and that a new book is a new story. Maybe because I grew up opening books written by other people as starting points for discovery, opening a book hits different pleasure centers than firing up an app -- even if the book is blank.  I wish I were too rational to be heartened by a new book crying out to be decorated by a pretty array of pens, but I never will be. I will always believe in the profound power of this ritual of the new journal, just like so many other people do. This time, for sure, I will gather up all the complicated fragments of planning and controlling and scheduling my life, connecting myself to all the people I care about, and getting myself out of the house now that I work at home. I will put it all in a book, and anything that's in a book ... well, it might not be literally true, but it will feel true.  Newsletter continues after sponsor message We Recommend The lovely John Moe invited me to appear on his new podcast Sleeping With Celebrities, in which various people explain some topic or other in the most sleep-inducing way possible, to help you drift off. I covered one of the subjects in which I have an unreasonable amount of expertise: the early seasons of Melrose Place.  I strongly recommend this interview with Philadelphia Phillies player Bryce Harper, in which, among other things, he discusses his affinity for the work of the romance writer Elle Kennedy.  Also recommended: Josh Gondelman has a list out of the 12 Most Boston Celebrities, Ranked By Boston-ness.  What We Did This Week David Jonsson and Vivian Oparah star in Rye Lane/Hulu I recapped the second episode of this season of Succession, in which karaoke made an appearance. I'll be recapping the one this weekend, as well, so stay tuned.  Stephen talked to our great pal Ayesha Rascoe about ChatGPT -- in fact, they made it write a song.  Aisha and I spoke with Monica Castillo and Cate Young about the delightful romantic comedy Rye Lane.  Stephen, Aisha and Glen talked about the Apple TV+ series The Big Door Prize, which they like a lot.  Aisha was not impressed by the movie Air, and she wrote about why.  We revisited a conversation that Stephen and I had with Kat Chow and E. Alex Jung about Top Chef, which is in the early stages of a new season.  I very much liked Beef, the new Netflix series starring Steven Yeun and Ali Wong. We'll also be covering it on the show soon, so check it out.  Stephen, Amil Niazi, Ronald Young, Jr. and Daisy Rosario talked about The Super Mario Bros. Movie. And Stephen also hosted New Music Friday over at NPR Music.  What's Making Us Happy Every week on the show, we talk about some other things out in the world that have been giving us joy lately. Here they are: Amil Niazi: Murder Mystery 2 on Netflix Ronald Young Jr.: If The Shoe Fits, by Julie Murphy Daisy Rosario: Dear Prudence by Daniel M. Lavery, You Will Find Your People, by Lane Moore Stephen Thompson: boygenius’ new album “the record” Stream your local NPR station. Visit NPR.org to find your local station stream. Subscribe to Pop Culture Happy Hour+. Your support helps make our show possible and unlocks access to our sponsor-free episodes. What do you think of today's email? We'd love to hear your thoughts, questions and feedback: pchh@npr.org Enjoying this newsletter? Forward to a friend! They can sign up here. Looking for more great content? Check out all of our newsletter offerings — including Music, Books, Daily News and more! 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